finally found some.

hooray!
......

my secret of evermore soundtrack is the bestest musicest everest. est. Man.

Hey, you! Piano playing person! i have a song i wanna send you, cuz u like music and i'd rather find something to talk about other than myself. The ghosts of narcissus command it. (pfffft) so if you download stuff its called Variations of Castle Theme on the Secret of Evermore game soundtrack. its the second track. So yeah i can send it to you, yeah i can do that. I can rip it off the cd.

hum dee dum. on that subject, what musics is you allz listening to lately? mines been the same for the most part, as my musical library hasn't had chance to expand for a little bit of time.

mmmm honey comb is delicious! i just realized i never got to see lucky number slevin. awwwww. now i have to waaaiiit. waaa eeet!

ha ha, man. i even got people at work making sounds n shit like i do! fucking making little boop sounds. Next everyone is going to slide and sashay around like i do. thatd be awesome! we could be a performing cook crew! sweet!



MAAAAAN!!!! im gonna have the super shits in the morning! i forgot my lactose whatever its called has been rollercoastering again (along with all the other allergies. Whoever thought of slot machine allergies was a sick bastard.

Oh yeah i as thinking of etymology earlier (errr, the study of words not insex and i couldn't remember which was which.) and i wondered where words and concepts such as bastard, sire, and pc loadletter all came from back in the day. wait not that last one. i meant something else i forgot. But yeah, why were these concepts important? were they ever thought of in another fashion? Were they acceptable traits of a previous ruling class or punishable by death? ya know, like the progression from monster to monster stories or something. assuming there were monsters.

Then what if everyone was the same person, and they just keep getting reincarnated? Thats what a belief in reintarnation would be like, it would imply that everyone keeps living and dying over and over again. But what happened if someone caught on? or almost caught on then died and had to start over? Then i thought of a funny jesus movie where dude realizes he only has 33 years to live, and keeps getting reincarnated and what his life is like each time around in a different era.

Or, perhaps there are a lot of people and theres ilke a waiting period? So you don't get reincarnated right into where you were so its crazy different every time? Or maybe its just "random" as in you just float around and get sucked into blackhole newborn baby vortexes of life. (i have and odd way of thinking about babies. Its not that i dislike them, its just i find them more like pets than people. it can be fun or not fun to take care of daily tasks, but they are always fun to play with. they just cry more.) So maybe its not just people its everything? Anything alive on this planet....

oh geez imagine being a plant, man! Thatd be CRAZY weird! wonder if it wuold feel like you were eating all day, then you were full all nite and the breeze and breathing all the time. oh man no sex! lame! but you could eat bugs and impress nerdy kids! (i was one) What about like...a fish? Thatd be scary! no wonder fish look like they are screaming all the time! they're neurotic paranoids! Noid! dominos!

weeeee1! awww, so this is what i was thinking about that lead to thinking about what if it wasn't just different new births for reincarnation, what if you could go back in time and be a caveman with dinosaurs or something...that post back there somewhere.

lol. thatd be sweet.

i wondered about smoking earlier....i wondered what if everyone smoked, all the time back in the past? like everyone, i was just like the thing to do? So like cowboys and indians were totally overacting n shit all the time! yeah! thats why movies are so right!

lol thats what the demons who haunt me in the nite sound like. im mightier than they, I who can slay their TV bodies with my magical remote of doooooom. ahhhh man i left all my books back in that last town i lived in. that lesbian whom i thought it would be fun to try and date. i gave them to her with my guitar.

what the fuck do i keep giving guitars away for? this is seriously detrimental. oh yeah, i thought i had a turn of good luck and was going to get some money from a good job and buy a nice one for once. Whoops. well after bonnaroo i can do that. actually it wasn't necessarily a troke of bad luck instead, i managed to pull some fast maneuvers so its not all bad.

did i absolutely love that piano song? (cd on repeat)

anyways

....boredome is much more fun when you're high. whats that you say? why be bored? because i'd rather not be a mooching bitch for rides to bars n friends houses all the time. they are being already awesome without me asking, im not gonna ask for anything more. they hardly ask me to do anything either, which makes me feel that much worse about it already! oooooo! nothing quite like arguing with imaginary selves either.

oh shit i just remembered what i actually wanted to post. i was thinking about art and how badly i wanted to be able to express my imagination visually adn i was thinking of drawings i would do right now if i could. i should try different modes of art, see if im good at anything.

one i thought of was called The Last Prince / The First King and it was 2 panels split by a wall in the middle, with a prince leaning against the marble wall, tis night time and he's in a pillared palace thats uphigh so that you only see the starry sky in the back ground. the prince is looking down with a soft smirk on his face, like a man whose just realized that his premonitions of death were right and he finds it amusing. his arms are crossed and one foot is pointed toe down resting on his other foot (like one stands when leanign sometimes) and leaning against the other side of the wall is a pirate, leaning back with his arms cross as well, but with both feet planted and gazing up into a daytime cloudy sky. he's on a ship, with the rest of the boat ahead of him and the sea and sky filling the background.

see? at least i can kidn of use words, but i wish i could just draw the stupid picture, so i could look at it and go "cool!" if nothing else.

but i can't draw details! i know, weird its some kind of mental block or something. I can't draw what im focusing or "doing"on purpose" and i can't freehand stuff either. proportions are always off, and i can never get small details right either. like if i drew the prince looking like i described him, he would end up looking like someone got angry and erased the paper too hard and went through the paper only to make him laugh because it was silly thing to get angry over.

so yeah then there was a silly one of a ninja with a blue suit on over his ninja suit, with white shirt and red tie and hanky and everything, and it was called "master assassin". the ninja would be standing like in an old painting with a white oval around his upper half (all that was showing) and a light blue backgroudn to fill the rest of the rectangle for the frame. lol.

then there was the Future of Orchestra that portrayed a man in the classic position of king on a throne, with one leg propped up and instead of hadn resting against his cheek/chin hes playing a guitar with his head back and all the prints on his kingly robes are musically themed (notes and such) and so are other acoutrements and accessories.

...

So this inventor invents a machine that constructs a world of his own design, then clones himself and has his conciousness inserted into the younger clone and he puts himself into his world. Ohh, heres a step up. a god decides to do the same, create a world and then live in it so he splits himself into 2 and puts his other half mindwiped and into baby form in this new world. thats what the old inventor explains to the younger clone, who are actually the two halves of the god, one explaining his fun to the other only realizing his mistake of separating himself afterwards, neither half retained enough power to merge their bodies, so they just did their minds and thus the god inhabited 2 bodies, which was really really weird for a while. Then he became pisces, Lowd of the Phishies!

Upon the seriousness of invention and managing to build your own world, would I do it? it would mean one would have to have it exist in its own dimension of sorts, though perhaps not universally sized like our own, just big enough to have the world in it, however big that may be. but not simulation, so it would all have to be made. I'd do it. i'd be the inventor in that last story. talk about endless fun....when you aren't being creative or soemthing you could just chill and enjoy what you've got so far...man! you'd have to share it though,i would. id share with other people. hmmmmm other people, one could hardly make people...thatd be weird. i mean other than conventionally, obviously. i can most certainly make other people that way, but its too long of a time to do it...unless i started now and used immortality technology to keep myself young while they grew to the age i want them to be, as i have manipulated their whole lives from a distance only to prune them to the particular character i want to populate my new world with....mwahahahahah! what an ass! that all sounds like the background to some final boss or something.

--Excerpts from the book "Daydreaming" by me just now.